How am I doing? Well, glad you asked.
I’m in that weird state of disbelief where just two days ago I was seeing someone and now I’m not.
The first few days are always super weird.
Like right now I’m looking at two wine glasses by my bedside that I have yet to take downstairs leftover from when were flopped and relaxing together, only a few nights ago.
I’m pretty sure that I jumped the gun when we ended things. I don’t know why I did other than the fact that I couldn’t really handle the distance that had been wedged between us.
It unnerved me and I just felt that our two styles of communicating were going to crash and burn and I couldn’t face it.
I saw it happening in slow motion and did nothing to stop it. Nor did he.
I don’t even know if it’s a good thing, the right thing or a bad thing.
I just know that I panicked, and I thought he was ending things so I ended things and he agreed to end things so pretty much we ended things. Over texts. Groan.
So today I’m just feeling really weird and have a few times wanted to tell him something that’s happened and then have realized that I probably can’t do that anymore.
So I’ll tell you. That Frenchie I accidentally adopted is in heat. I met with my vet when I first adopted her and he said that she was so old that spaying her would not have any real health benefits. She isn’t good with other dogs, I never let her off leash and all my dogs are neutered so I decided not to spay her.
So today I look up and Tyrone is vigorously humping Max. He does that sometimes anyway, so it wasn’t that out of the ordinary. But then I noticed that Max in turn was trying to hump Zoe and they were making a kind of train. Love was in the air, apparently.
Zoe hates all my dogs, especially Max, so I was floored to see her back her tushie right up to him as if to say, “Climb Aboard!”
Zoe has spent a good part of the day trying to get one of my dogs to do her. I’m not gonna tell you all the ways she’s tried but at one point I exclaimed in my head that I didn’t even know that dogs did that!
She’s been licking jowls and wieners and acting like she’s everyone’s best friend all of a sudden. The boys are interested, but hormonally challenged, and it’s so hot out that everyone has given up and is napping.
Anyway it’s like the Love Boat over here, but with dogs.
I’m going to go see some music outside over in Marin and it should be beautiful out.
If we were still seeing each other, I’d still be going alone because he had stuff this weekend and we really don’t seem to connect much on the weekends anyway.
It’s almost as if it’s the same.
Only it isn’t.